hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
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