im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
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