i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
