we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Randomize