so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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