U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
