I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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