I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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