whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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