Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(301): View more from Maryland

I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot

Fav 51 8028 1247
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(315): View more from New York

It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"

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(850): View more from Florida

I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses

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(406): View more from Montana

I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation

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(509): View more from Washington

So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay

Fav 2 94 36
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(561): View more from Florida

I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint

Fav 0 34 14
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