I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
