At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
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