Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
