this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize