you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
