ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Randomize
