Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
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