Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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