I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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