just come out here and I will go home with you...
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize
