someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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