Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
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