Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
