in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
