How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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