i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
