Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
we should paint friendship bongs
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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