Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Do you still have your period?
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Randomize