just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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