They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize