It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I'm always down for nudity.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
