I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
