dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize
