After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
