Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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