is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
The adults are the big ones right?
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
