I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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