He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I need to align my fucking chakras
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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