hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
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