In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
