I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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