That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
