I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
