Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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