i may or may not be watching the land before time
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
