yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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