Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize