Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
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