just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Is it penis luge time yet?
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
