i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
