ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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