I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
